Hello Fellow Traveler,

     My name is Brian King and I have been shaped by many things in my life. I've learned and continue to learn much through my experiences  as a Father, a Husband, A Social Worker, An 18 year Cancer Survivor, The Present Moment, Serendipity, Simplicity, Zen. . . And The List Goes On And On! My greatest Gift and the lens through which I have taken all of these experiences in, is the lens of Asperger's Autism (as I call it). I learned this about myself in the Summer of 2005. The more I learn the more I realize that Asperger's is intricately woven throughout me and thus a powerful component of who I am. Although I've only recently become aware of it it's something that has been working with me since birth.

     Although Asperger's has been defined by the "experts" as a Syndrome I don't see it as such. Nor do I view it as a Disorder.  A Syndrome is defined as "a group of symptoms that characterize an abnormality."  A Disorder refers to "a disturbance in the order of normal functions." Both ideas are fundamentally flawed in that they assume that a variance from the norm is wrong, and therefore that all efforts must be made to return the Autistic brain to the norm. This to me is like saying someone who speaks a foreign language has an English disorder and their speaking must be returned to English if they're to be considered normal. A disorder is in the eye of the person or people defining what "normal" means.

     Of those on the Spectrum I've had the good fortune of meeting, we agree that we see ourselves as we are and possess our own sense of normalcy. I base my life on Order and logic instead of the chaos many neurotypicals invite into their lives. My world makes sense to me and the neurotypical world seems ripe with confusion and hypocrisy. I'll stay here on my home planet thank you. 

     Asperger's is certainly not a Disability which is "an inability to perform by illness, injury, or malfunction." What Asperger's is is the Gift of Specialized Thinking and Ability. Our brains are more refined and focused by design not by injury or illness. What some may call special gifts accompanied by learning deficits or disabilities is in my mind indicative of a brain that by virtue of its specialized design simply has different and very specific priorities. Simply because this specialized thinking and ability doesn't mirror neurotypical ability doesn't make it a Disorder or Disability. For example, when you look in a tool chest you'll find different tools that can be used to accomplish specific tasks. You wouldn't look at a screwdriver and say it has a disorder because it doesn't work like a hammer. Would you?

   Why would you look at another human being who is Gifted with specific interests, incredible focus and the innate ability to divest oneself of the destructive politics that are called normal socialization and think they have a way of being that requires correction?

    I recently visited a website that went so far as to characterize Autism as a "Disease." Disease as in "a disordered or incorrectly functioning . . . system of the body resulting from the effect of genetic or developmental errors, infection, poisons, nutritional deficiency or imbalance, toxicity, or unfavorable environmental factors." Gee I feel better about myself already.

     The author of this website explained that viewing Autism as a "Disorder" makes it tolerable while seeing it as a "Disease" makes it curable. I hope you realize what an obscene point of view this is and how it creates more problems than it solves. I choose to view Autism as neither a "Disorder" nor as a "Disease" because both assume there's something wrong with being on the Spectrum. I admit that some children could benefit from all of the available educational opportunities to help them better cope with and function in the neurotypical world. Sort of a "Hitchhikers Guide to the Neurotypical Galaxy."

     I prefer to look at any form of Autism as a unique neurology to be explored, understood and respected instead of dreaded and eradicated. Every person whether Neurotypical or on the Spectrum begins life with a unique set of gifts. Each child requires support from their parents and community to reach their potential. As any child grows they change, mature and ideally they grow. Sure children on the Spectrum may require more effort to help them grow but this fact need not be described as either a "Disorder" or "Disease" nor should their eccentric personality traits be described as "Symptoms."

     All it means is that these children need to work harder and the rest of us along with them. I wasn't diagnosed until I was an adult and as I look back at my childhood it was traumatic and confusing which I attribute more to how others responded to my uniqueness than to the uniqueness itself. No matter what you call Autism there is a general intolerance and impatience in society for people that won't "pull themselves up by their bootstraps" which results in much of the hardships people on the Spectrum face. I once tried to explain to a colleague the nature of my sensory sensitivities due to the Asperger's and she said I was making excuses. Some people just don't get it.

     In all, none of us is born perfect, we each walk our own path and some of us walk a bumpier road than others. We are born who we are warts and all and we all have the capacity to learn and grow. None of us deserves to be told that who we are should be thought of as "Disordered" or "Diseased." We're just people.

     I shared these thoughts via email with the individual who has spearheaded the campaign to view Autism as a "Disease" to be cured. He responded by writing "I agree, people have the right to choose their own paths. As parents we have the sacred duty of choosing the path we see as most beneficial for our children."

I didn't respond to that statement because I didn't want an argument but had I responded I would have pointed out that 1) the two sentences in his response contradicted each other. How can he agree that people have the right to choose their own paths while simultaneously believing that parents should choose their children's paths for them? 2) It is our sacred duty to be a guide for our children as they choose their path, it is not our job to choose their path for them. This world is made great by those who follow the beat of a different drummer not who choose to walk in rhythm with everyone else. Lastly, how wise could a parent's choice possibly be if their premise for guiding or choosing a path for their child is that their child is "Diseased" and that their personality is a composite of "Symptoms?" I'm not perfect and my children aren't perfect, but they sure as hell aren't "Disordered," "Disabled," or "Diseased."

     For those who want to Cure Autism I can say only this, Get away from me!!! It is an unfortunate person who is so unable to see beyond the negative that they cannot see the beauty in any child simply because this child does not navigate this world according to their standards.

     Thomas Edison was not put on this planet to be a social butterfly or make sure his clothing kept up with the latest styles. Instead he was gifted with an unbreakable tenacity and perseverance that led to some of the greatest inventions ever. All this by virtue of his Autism. Had he been cured I'd likely be typing this by candle light. Because Edison was endowed by his creator with specialized thinking and ability that didn't include a preoccupation with actively filling up his social calendar, nor was he receptive to or even interested in the discouraging words of those around him we have the light bulb and many other technological masterpieces. Cure that!

     Just because not every Autistic is an Edison doesn't mean that their Autism is a curse. The intolerance and arrogance that prevents others from accepting and understanding those on the Autistic Spectrum is the same intolerance and arrogance that fuels other societal diseases such as racism. This cognitive disease is rooted in the obsession many people have with making everyone like themselves in order to be more comfortable with the world and feel more secure about themselves.

     I can only speak for myself as a proud member of a rapidly growing minority group that is simply looking for acceptance, understanding and respect. One way I hope to do that is by offering my knowledge of what it's like to live in the world that is my Asperger's Autism.

     My son's first grade teacher said it best when she said "Each autistic child is a snowflake. Though they're all snowflakes they're each unique unto themselves." I can share my thoughts, experiences and perceptions in an attempt to give you a glimpse into the world of those in your life who have the gift of living on the Autistic Spectrum. I'd like to help you empower those you love and I'd like to help empower you.

     We are all walking an individual journey through this life, the Autistics and Neurotypicals alike. We have a lot to learn from each other. Learning requires a simple curiosity that compels one to want to know in order to become better through the experience of knowing. So let's get to know each other.

     Often neurotypicals (especially the experts) make the mistake of learning about a person with the agenda of seeing what isn't "normal" in order to fix it. I wonder what would happen if those same people instead sought to get to know those on the Autistic Spectrum in order to learn from them instead of fix them. Only things that are broken require fixing. Should you change for me because I don't like the way you think or act? Then why ask it of me? Simply learn from and share with each other through a process of mutual respect, admiration and a sincere desire to learn from one another. Many of my neurotypical friends have benefited from my way of thinking.

     I'm not saying that those on the Autism Spectrum are perfect, no one is. We could all use a little polishing. Many of those on the Spectrum might benefit from learning the language of Neurotypical Socialization, much like someone traveling to Spain might benefit from learning the Spanish language and some of the customs. This idea is reasonable. What is not reasonable is to insist that someone become Spanish in order to interact with Spanish citizens, as many people insist that those on the Spectrum defy and hide who they are by adopting neurotypical behaviors in order to fit in and be more "normal."

     I've met many people who kid themselves into believing that someone can be socialized out of their Autism. Putting a fresh coat of paint on something doesn't change what it is underneath. Nor does teaching an Autistic a few neurotypical behaviors. Sometimes Aspies (myself included) perform some of the preferred behaviors just so you'll get off our backs. I perform my required behaviors in order to maintain employment but these behaviors are in no way comfortable nor do they feel natural. I feel like a fraud when I act "normally," but in an intolerant world these "normal" behaviors are currently necessary. I dream for a world when I can be as Aspie as I want to be and where others will ask me what I know instead of asking what's wrong with me.

     I do appreciate the tools I've acquired throughout the years that allow me to navigate through the neurotypical world and speak the language of the majority. I do enjoy the company of many wonderful people I've met both on and off the Spectrum, especially my wife. Again, just because I've learned to do neurotypical things doesn't mean I enjoy them. I'm still Autistic underneath.

     If we can take the time to learn the ways of the neurotypical why can't you reciprocate every now and then instead of just trying to cure us all the time. Being Autistic is pretty fun and life is often much less complicated as a result. Life is only anxiety producing when we need to leave the mother ship and venture into the chaotic world you all have created for yourselves.

    Anyway enough ranting. I'm pleased to meet you, let's talk and learn from each other. . . .

   Brian R. King studied Social Work at Aurora University in Aurora, Illinois where he received his Master's Degree. Brian is currently a Licensed Clinical Social Worker in the state of Illinois. Brian focuses his coaching practice on the issues faced by individuals on the Asperger's end of the Autism Spectrum and serves as an Advisory Board Member for "The Autism Perspective Magazine."

     Brian was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome in the summer of 2005 along with his oldest son Zachary. In addition to having Asperger's, Brian is also an 18 yr cancer survivor.  Brian's current endeavors include authoring several books, including What To Do When You're Totally Screwed  and Reflections: A Poetic Look At Life. He is presently working on a book about Asperger's.

     Brian currently resides in Plainfield, Illinois where he lives with his wife of 10 years Katie (Diagnosed PDD in 2006) and their three sons Zach (age 9) diagnosed with Asperger's in 2005, Aidan (age 5) diagnosed with Autism in 2007 and Connor (23 months). Visit his site at www.imanaspie.com